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The Worst Millionaire

30 Day Writing Challenge – Day 26

If you had $1,000,000 to spend, how would you spend it?

I don’t think one million is enough for a private island that is up to my standards, so I guess I’ll have to keep my millionaire shopping list on the cheap side. I might be able to pay off my student loans though. And with the remaining 99 cents, I could buy myself a pack of gum.

If one million dollars just fell into my lap, I’d probably wonder who would give me a million dollars. I might look around for the owner for a bit, just so I could make sure they wanted me to have their lottery winnings. I don’t even look like a smart spender. I look like the kind of person who would blow a million dollars on black clothing and beanie babies.

But if this person was CERTAIN they wanted me to have this money for reasons I would never understand, I would just hold onto it and continue living the life I’m living. I’d finish college, start my career, and buy a car and a house. The only difference would be I wouldn’t have stress due to money issues. One million dollars is a pretty good nest egg. If I ever fall behind on car/house payments or bills, I could just tap into my million. And when the mafia inevitably came for me, I could pay them off.

Sorry I’m so practical with my one mil.

OR I could buy a secret headquarters from which to hide from the enemies I would make by wisely investing my money into the rival companies of big corporations just to stick it to the man. I would also have to hire an economic genius to explain this stuff to me because I am certain my plan has a lot of holes in it.

But a piece of a private island doesn’t sound too bad either.

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2 thoughts on “The Worst Millionaire”

  1. Nice post! You have a great sense of humor. I’m a stand-up comedian in Los Angeles. Let me tell you – a sense of humor will get you through a lot of life’s challenges. Both personally and interpersonally. Keep up the great writing here on your blog! 😎

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much and I agree completely! I’ve also been meaning to watch the stand-up video you posted to your blog! I’ll be sure to let you know what I think once I get around to watching it!

      Liked by 1 person

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